Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Two penises later: I might be straighter than I think.
You act like pregaming preseason hockey is a crime. Come on man, get fucked up and watch pucks. It rhymes so well it has to go together. DOS EQUIS Y DEVILS!
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
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