Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
Randomize
