One girl and one boy is just not enough.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
