She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I just opened my filing cabinet at work for the first time in months. It looks just like my pantry: nothing but peanut butter and whiskey.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Randomize
