WOAH SHIT! That wasn't my girlfriend last night.
Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
I love how my cats smell like pot.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize
