So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
I'm assuming you were here at some stage because I woke up alone, clean and in a towel with mum asking my why my shoes, dress and jewellery were in the bottom of the shower.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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