she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
You've changed since you got that strap on
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
Randomize