I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
Considering that my ex-wife dumped me to become a lesbian, the Universe owes me a threesome.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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