absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
I left my keys in the garlic bread freezer in Publix.
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
It's not weird mascara. I just have puke crusted on my eyelashes.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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