I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
you didnt know i had herpes?
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Lets play hurricane shelter. And the shelter is my bed, and we forgot our clothes.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
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