I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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