you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'm determined to sit on that face.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
