Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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