Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I have all the porn. Be there soon
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