I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
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