she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Just had to kick my 26 yr old boyfriend out of my bed before getting the kids up for school. Have I mentioned being 41 doesn't suck as much as all the hype.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Randomize
