Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Today I'm judging my level of singleness on a scale of one to eat-a-can-of-frosting. It's not looking good for me.
Ooooh. Get funfetti
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
