we made out on top of his cat.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Randomize
