alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
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