well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
His last name was woodcox? That just screams I've got a great penis
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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