She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
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