It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
I woke up this morning to 7 word documents that all said "remember to be extremely angry at your jerk of a brother." What the hell did you do to me last night?
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize
