Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Tonight will bring shame to my future grandchildren.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize