So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
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