I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
when in doubt, mount your coworker in the staff room.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
Randomize
