My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
Randomize
