there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
