Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
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