similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
And then he came out of the bathroom in a kimono
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Randomize
