yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
I'm lit.While shaving my legs I pretended the razor was a tractor cutting down corn. Noises included.
anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
