i had the deer in headlights look when she walked in and i was digging in her hamper
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Is Oprah even human
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize