Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
Just had a flash back. Pretty sure i ate toilet paper last night.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
