I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
it's pretty bad when you go in bed bath and beyond and recognize 6 different bed spreads you've had sex on
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Randomize
