what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
Apparently, I woke up in the middle of the night, got up out of bed, dropped trou in the corner, squatted, and pissed on the carpet. When Eric heard, he thought it was the dog and started yelling, and I responded by saying "No no, its okay. It's me."
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Randomize
