oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
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