Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
I think I can smell my own vagina right now
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
