so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize