I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I'm currently watching porn and playing beer pong with wine in the lobby of a hotel with a squadron of hot airforce guys. You can never say your life is better than mine again
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