how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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