Those balls look pretty dangerous.
apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
Randomize
