everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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