You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
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