at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Dude someone changed all the contacts in my phone to I Like Eggs
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Randomize
