love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize