I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize
