I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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