I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
When did angry sex become our thing?
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
