ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
