I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
You looked cold, so i decided to make you a blanket out of sticky notes.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
