So drunk, too bad you don't want this
I'm just that much of a man that I can watch Ellen and Oprah back to back and still like girls.
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Randomize
